Yo, Steve, it's Monday!
Thank you for allowing me to become a contributor to your inestimable Web site, which has become an archive of wisdom, humor, and fearless opinion steeped in the best traditions of generations of American tipplers. I look forward to contributing to the fun.
But hey, can I have a week's probation to learn all these new buttons and things?
Cheers, everybody. A picture of my credentials is (hopefully) attached.

MORE: Where are the olives? What's the recipe? I'm glad you asked! Watch, listen, and learn from young Patrick Dennis in this clip from the 1958 movie classic: Auntie Mame. Thusly did I learn to make martinis oh so many years ago.
The martini scene comes about half way through the clip. The entire movie is a hoot -- watch it all sometime. My drinking buds and I have seen it DOZENS of times over the years.
hey probie, get a coaster under that thing before mrs steve has a cow!
(welcome to the show...)
...Yes, but what's the recipe?
Dude,
Where are the olives ?
I know, rookie mistake ;)
Good news.
While the detailed chemistry is not fully understood, shaken martinis are much more effective than either gin or vermouth alone at deactivating hydrogen peroxide, and about twice as effective when shaken as opposed to being stirred.
Svedka
half of a cap of sweet vermouth
shake vigorously
three olives