Big penis news from Belgium:
The condition of a 39-year-old man who was found last Thursday in Antwerp with a stab wound to the throat and dismembered penis is stable. Antwerp public prosecution authorities now think the man's injuries are due to self-mutilation. After a Linkeroever resident found the man, the victim was admitted to the Sint-Vincentius Hospital. Police later found the severed penis and rushed it back to the hospital. The exact circumstances of the incident remain unknown.
I'd comment, but I already wrote the world's funniest severed penis story four years ago.
Did the police chief in Antwerp recall any similar incidents?
Heh, heh, heh, I went back to the old post and love this bit:
"First of all, when you say you've found a penis, then the word "severed" becomes redundant."
Simply Classic!
It must be late and I must be tired because when I read "The exact circumstances of the incident remain unknown" what I saw was "The exact CIRCUMCISIONS of the incident remain unknown." And then I had a slight Beavis and Butthead moment.
Oh, one more comment - kinda reminds me of the King Missile song Detachable Penis. Damn, now that song is stuck in my head and I won't be able to sleep.
You are damn right that is the world's funniest severed penis story. I laughed so hard everyone around wants to know what I'm reading, and I can't tell them. Thanks a lot.
Did I ever tell you guys that Lorena Bobbitt is my idol?
A little old lady is walking down the street, dragging two plastic garbage bags with her, one in each hand. There's a hole in one of the bags, and every once in a while a $20 bill flies out onto the pavement.
Noticing this, a policeman stops her and comments, "Ma'am, there are $20 bills falling out of that bag..."
"Damn!" says the little old lady. "I'd better go back and see if I can still find some. Thanks for the warning!"
"Well, now, not so fast," says the cop. "How did you get all that money?"
" Did you steal it?"
"Oh, no", says the little old lady. "You see, my back yard backs up to the parking lot of the football stadium. Each time there's a game, a lot of fans come and pee in the bushes, right into my flower beds!"
"So, I go and stand behind the bushes with a big hedge clipper, and each time someone sticks his little thingie through the bushes, I say: $20 or off it comes!"
"Hey, not a bad idea!" laughs the cop. "OK, good luck! By the way, what's in the other bag?"
"Well," says the little old lady, "not all of them pay up. "
