|
|
Guilty Pleasures
Posted by Stephen Green · 9 February 2005
Now that Enterprise is on its last voyage, Adam Yoshida has a few ideas on how to revive the Trek franchise: Star Trek: Smallville: The "Starfleet Academy" idea proposal has been floating around for years. At least since the time before Star Trek 6 was made. It's an idea with potential. If executed correctly, it might well work. Earlier in his essay, Yoshida heaped some criticism on Enterprise I found unfair. True, the show got so bad in the second half of the second season and the first half of the third season, that I stopped watching for a while. But with the exception of only two or three clunkers, the fourth (and final) season has been outstanding. The last year of Enterprise has been "historically" (in the Trekkiverse sense) "fascinating" (Spock's word) and morally serious. In short, it's been damn fine TV. But if "Star Trek: Smallville" were to take off, with someone as pretty as Smallville's Tom Welling in the lead, I can tell you this much: My wife will be watching. And she'll ovulate every time he takes his shirt off. As someone who's watched Smallville with his bride, trust me, I know. Comments
Star Trek has always suffered from lack of imagination. Aliens always are humanoid or at least bisymmetrical. They all speak English (finessed by language translator). Ships meeting in space always are oriented as if they were in an atmosphere. Whooshing sounds in a vacuum. Recycled PC stories. ST Enterprise suffers from a circumscribed premise that vitiates the infinite possibilities of the future. Babylon 5 and Stargate SG-1 are much better. Bones, Spoc, what...have they done to Star...Trek? Posted by: David Govett at February 10, 2005 01:33 AMThe world turned upside down: the same week Star Trek is cancelled, Battlestar Galactica gets renewed for a second season. Who'd'a thunk it? FWIW, I'd say Star Trek needs exactly what Galactica got: a very long rest. It's been in constant production for nearly 30 years now. Time to take a breather. Posted by: Will Collier at February 10, 2005 05:53 AMLaw & Order: That would be interesting, could even use Spock! CSI:Vulcan, while it sounds good, would have to have excellent story editors to work. The ability to just make up a new gizmo to solve the crime of the week could create too many easy outs. Posted by: Eric at February 10, 2005 06:38 AMCSI: Vulcan would also be too hard for the opposite reason: The new gizmo of the week could make the perfect crime too easy. Move it to the Sci Fi channel. How about: Andorian Idol Star Trek went south when the producers forgot they were doing space opera, and thought they were doing "Masterpiece Theater." The shows became overly-mannered, faux-erudite, and relentlessly PC. Also, Tom Welling is way too pretty. Aaron Douglas, the crew chief on BSG has a down-home, red-state, workingman hotness about him. And, he's banging a cylon. How cool is that? Posted by: V the K at February 10, 2005 08:03 AMStar Trek needs two things...new writers and a fresh perspective. A production break might help, but ST is virtually its own genre now. I think the best thing for the franchise would be to cut out the spinoffs and prequels and go back to its roots. Set a new series smack in the middle of the timeline of the original, but update it with modern effects, realistic space combat, and far more fully developed alien races. It may be too much sacrilidge to cast a new Kirk, Spock, etc, but there were a lot more ships than just the Enterprise out there. Or they could just pander to the masses with "Klingon Fear Factor". Posted by: Mike M at February 10, 2005 08:07 AMWhat has been festering for decades on this show, starting with the original, are the Romulans. I would love to see an all-out war among the Romulans, Klingons and the Federation. The Romulans hate everyone. The Klingons hate the Romulans and have an uneasy truce with the Federation. The Federation trusts neither. Technologically they are equals -- tactics and stategery would prevail -- as long as the Borg do not show up and kick ass. Posted by: dittybopper at February 10, 2005 08:26 AMHow about a show where the main character is a blogger? Then every week he could star the show by saying "Captain's Blog, permalink 175.4" Posted by: Duane at February 10, 2005 08:47 AMI think the Xindi thing killed Enterprise. That entire season will be impossible to show in syndication because it has to be sequential. Voyager suffered somewhat the same problem, but it tried to stick to 60 minute episodes that would end with some type of closure. Nielsen also killed Enterprise. There are a ton of people who watch the show, but none of this seems to matter. Posted by: Aaron at February 10, 2005 08:59 AMForget Star Turk. I want to see Chris Carter make The Weapon Shops of Isher, The Moon is a Harsh Mistress or almost any James P. Hogan novel. Posted by: Stephen at February 10, 2005 10:13 AMAaron: do season-long metaplots really make shows unsyndicatable these days? X-Files, Buffy and Angel don't seem to be suffering for that sin too badly, and the Xindi thing wasn't any more tightly plotted than some of their season arcs. I mean, it's not like it was Star Trek:24. [Which would make another interesting concept for a next series, although requiring a switch from the "syndication" model to the "sell the DVD sets" model. And the latter model is probably the more profitable one for a franchise with the kind of big-spending core fanbase as Trek.] Posted by: Jeff R. at February 10, 2005 10:14 AMTime for a loooong rest for Trek. They've basically exhausted the storylines available to the point where every episode has a "I've seen this before" feeling about them. If they want a revival in their fortunes, they need to cut their supply of new trek and let the demand build up a little. Now, I know it will never happen, but if I could have a wish for a sci-fi tv show, it would be to force George Lucas to allow someone else to play in his Star Wars universe and produce a tv show in that setting.... Of course, Lucas will be dead before this happens. Unless the show is titled "Star Wars: Jar-Jar's Joyous Journies" Posted by: BC Monkey at February 10, 2005 11:02 AMBC, you're gonna get your wish. Lucas has a Star Wars TV series in development right now. Let's just hope he doesn't hire anybody who wrote, directed, or even saw the '78 "Holiday Special"... Posted by: Will Collier at February 10, 2005 11:13 AMI like the idea of The Starfleet Academy, maybe with the characters from the original show. Kirk probably had some "interesting" solutions to problems he faced. It could be a little lighter and not quite as serious as Star Trek has been recently. Posted by: Ryan Scott at February 10, 2005 11:16 AMWhat I'd like (living outside the US I have to take my Trek in dubbed German now). The franchise isn't necessarily dead, but they're always relying on a static ship-based format (even DS9 seemed to be stuck on the idea). I'd say a new format could probably generate new ideas and new kinds of storylines. I'd go for either Starfleet academy (but new people so you can kill some of them off if necessary) in a time of crisis (not Romulan war, that's boring). Maybe a return of the bug race that took over people or something like that (preferably better but it should be non-humanoid, puzzling and dangerous). The focus should be on the teachers (especially field assignments) with shifting students every season or two. I also like the idea of a troubleshooting agency (rather than a ship's crew). Agents who solve problems of various kinds in various parts of the federation (and maybe undercover in non-federation areas) but who aren't attached to a ship. This could be done with 3 and 4 week arcs a way of looking for new formats that might work. One arc might have an agent going undercover in part of the Romulan empire while another arc might be a small team sent in to settle a tangled dispute between human and ferengi settlers on a frontier world both have some claim to. Posted by: Michael Farris at February 10, 2005 11:56 AMRE season-long metaplots -- Babylon 5 was a great show with multiseason metaplots. Posted by: dittybopper at February 10, 2005 12:16 PMFerengi Apprentice? Apiring Ferengi could gouge colonists and pirate wayward vessles for a chance to command their own starship! Or maybe Romulan Alias...where everyone spies on everyone, every episode contains at least one lie detector test, and 3/4 of the show's dialouge is: "WHO DO YOU WORK FOR!?!" Posted by: Mike M at February 10, 2005 12:24 PMStar Trek: Section 31 They can do an Alias type show in the ST Universe. Posted by: Vea Victis at February 10, 2005 02:23 PMStar Trek could go several ways. Here are a few suggestions: 1)It's time for Brannon Braga and Rick Berman to move on. I don't think that Voyager and Enterprise have done the franchise any favors. 2)Bring in some new talent with a fresh outlook. Have the federation abandon it's socialist utopia bullshit. Look at Firefly. It's Star Trek told from the perspective of Cyrano Jones. Plus, there are no aliens and the Federation are bad guys. 3)Get rid of ILM or whovever does their FX. Zoic has set a new standard for space opera visual effects. 4)Consider bringing Ron Moore back. Granted he may be thought of as a Trek killer with Battlestar Galactica, but he has ideas and is a great writer. The franchise is suffering without him. 5)Finally, whoever the jackass is who is repsonsible for the theme of Enterprise should be shown the window. Posted by: Drew at February 10, 2005 02:27 PM "5)Finally, whoever the jackass is who is repsonsible for the theme of Enterprise should be shown the window." What's wrong with the theme of Enterprise? I think it captures the essence of humanity's (way, way too) long climb to the heavens, and goes perfectly with the shots of all the steps between "HMS Enterprize" and Man's long-awaited liberation from his home planet. Posted by: Ken at February 10, 2005 02:36 PMThe easiest way to fix Star Trek is to make all time-travel stories a firing offense among the writers ... and by firing, I don't mean job loss. Posted by: Robin Roberts at February 10, 2005 02:44 PMI'd watch a Star Trek West Wing show. I'd be alone, and it would be cancelled mid-season, but I'd watch it. I'm really into Galactica now. It's a better show for a number of reasons, particularly since it has a lower tech level. It also features real romantic relationships between adults -- something that Trek never did well. It also features sex with a nuclear-hot Cylon supermodel, and Trek never did that well, either. I'm afraid DS9 represents the maximum level of complexity and depth possible in the Star Trek franchise. And hey, if you want to watch crude fantasies about omnipotent governments solving everything with technobabble, you can still watch the West Wing... Posted by: Michael Duff at February 10, 2005 03:27 PMStill have 80 years or so and two ships between Enterprise A and Enterprise D. Original series left lots of loose ends behind that have never been followed up on. Though I suspect fresh writers and fresh overhead would help, as well as a long rest. Majel, you've done your bit, now go judge dog shows or something. Posted by: JSAllison at February 10, 2005 03:27 PMThe easiest way to fix Star Trek is to make all time-travel stories a firing offense among the writers ... and by firing, I don't mean job loss. Yeah, and include in that using the holodeck as a plot device. Posted by: scottm at February 10, 2005 03:31 PMEvery time I see Nazi, gangster, 60s hippie, wacky sitcom-like relative, etc., on ST, I yell and reach for my phaser. The Mute button is the perfect accompaniment for the ST Enterprise theme. It makes my exoskeleton crawl. Posted by: PacRim Jim at February 10, 2005 04:11 PMIf you do the Starfleet Academy version maybe you could get Orson Scott Card to write it because it sounds a lot like "Ender's Game", but then there's a movie of that already planned. Posted by: Arthur at February 10, 2005 04:18 PMHere's my solution to "fix" Enterprise. Keep airing it for another 3 years. I will keep watching it. Problem solved. Posted by: Josh at February 10, 2005 05:01 PM"When Holodecks Attack" The problem is that that became much of TNG's plot after the fourth season. I consider myself a huge Trek fan, able to give you the plot if you name the TNG episode, or name the TNG episode if you describe the plot. Originality suffered, though, after the fourth season, and I refused to distinguish between those awful "holodeck is on the fritz again" episodes. "The Big Goodbye" was the first episode dealing with holodeck trouble, and I don't think it can ever be approached. Comedy: Riker's grin when Wesley blurts out "Teenage mating rituals?!", and the flirting policeman's stare when Dr. Crusher swallows the gum. Romance: Picard flirting with a VERY fetching Dr. Crusher. A very wistful ending. But I digress. Posted by: Perry at February 10, 2005 05:16 PMPlease don't even think of sending in Ron Moore! Enterprise has been screwed up enough thank you very much. Whoever the Brainiac was that came up with all of the time travel stories out to be forced to watch them like the fans but I think there is a Geneva Convention rule against that. Capt. Janeway had it right: "the future is the past, that past is the future...it gives me a headache." Us too my dear! Gotta agree that they finally fixed a lot of the story lines this season. I have been pleasantly surpised for the most part. Too little too late I guess. I don't blame the fans for not giving them a chance after last season. I turned the channel after the first episode and blew off the rest of the season. I don't think that the ST franchise is tired I think that they haven't a clue how to write an interesting character. Voyager was saved by Seven, DS9 was saved by Worf, and Enterprise could have been saved by putting the Andorian Commander aboard. Posted by: rjsasko at February 10, 2005 06:13 PMI'm not sure if it's really the series or even the overall plots, so much as the quality of the writing. Much of Star Trek writing, especially that of Voyager and Enterprise has been just, well, bad. One of the problems with the series is that writers tend to rely on plot and technogeegaws at the expense of everything else, including character development. Dialogue also could stand some improvement. Less preaching would be nice. Moral lessons should be something the viewer discovers, instead of having them thrust at his face. In making huge decisions, characters should face moral issues slightly more complex than a junior-high classroom discussion, and clever win-win solutions should not be so easily obtainable. In other words: time to start writing for adults. Actually, Enterprise had a couple of good moments of this -- e.g. when they had to leave a friendly alien starship stranded. The "Vulcan fascism" storyline was also good, though sadly, the writers couldn't resist a trite "happy ending." Posted by: E. Nough at February 10, 2005 06:21 PMWhat's wrong with the theme of Enterprise?It's a Rod Stewart clone singing a Rod Stewart song written by Diane Warren for a Robin Williams movie. What's right with it? Posted by: Dave at February 10, 2005 09:53 PM Here's the thing: no one but the most ardent fan gives a crap about the "Trek universe." Fans (myself included) have a hard time wrapping their heads around this, but it's true. So an Academy or CSI show might as well be in another sci-fi setting as Trek. The Academy/Smallville show might work, but why not just recast the original crew and film new adventures? Who cares if a half dozen nutcases are convinced that only Shatner can be Kirk? How many people have played Dr. Who, or Sherlock Holmes? The chemistry of the actors was part of the original show's "success," yes, but the chemistry of the *characters,* plus the bombastic, melodramatic, entertaining writing were also major factors. You had that in some instances with TNG, but not with anything since. Go back to the roots. More Kirk, Spock, and McCoy. Updated. But just as melodramatic. STAR TREK KREP'LACH! Why not a spinoff devoted to the Klingons and their various civil wars, clan feuds, epic drinking bouts, and border clashes with the Romulans? The Klingons were always the most interesting characters (at least since the original Trek Series) -- always drinking, brawling, freebooting and causing trouble, and those two sisters with the Major League cleavage poking out of their combat suits. Much more macho than the Ferenghi, warm-blooded than the Romulans, and sexier than the Cardassians. And endearingly politically incorrect, as opposed to the post-Kirk Starfleet with their "counselors". Anyway, this nerd's two-cents' worth.
Sorry, no more Kirk/McCoy/Spock/Scotty... The new Starfleet wouldn't tolerate Kirk's hitting on hot, young female officers and Alien Princesses, nor his flexible interpretation of the Prime Directive; McCoy would be expelled for racism for making fun of Spock's ears and green-blood; Scotty would be packed off to "counseling" and detox for his drinking; and Spock would resign in boredom from the inferior Starfleet Academy human product. I mean, Will Wheaton?! Helloooo!. --furious Posted by: furious_a at February 11, 2005 01:51 PMI vote for a Klingon Trek. Just once I'd like to see the peace negotiations break down and turn into a bloodbath, just to break up the monotony. Posted by: Klingon Negotiator at February 11, 2005 05:20 PMLNS: "The Academy/Smallville show might work, but why not just recast the original crew and film new adventures? Who cares if a half dozen nutcases are convinced that only Shatner can be Kirk? How many people have played Dr. Who, or Sherlock Holmes?" And that's the point behind The New Voyages: http://www.newvoyages.com/. It's a fan-produced pair of Kirk-Spock-McCoy-Old Enterprise episodes. They don't claim these shows are professional -- though the sets and costumes are dead-on accurate reproductions of classic Trek, and the CGI special effects are far better than the best that 1966-68 could offer. Rather, they're trying to demonstrate to Paramount that the classic Trek era and characters are a viable mine for new stories with new actors. The first episode is BAD. B-A-D. The writing is fannish, with LOTS of cribbing from old episodes and the films. Worse, it seems like it's supposed to be funny, and it's not. But it showed enough promise in terms of production and effects for the team to get encouragement to produce the second episode. And the second episode? Not perfect, but pretty decent. They got some decent writing talent and some consulting from Roddenberry Jr. By "pretty decent", I mean that if "Turnabout Intruder" were on -- or "The Empath", or "And the Children Shall Lead", or "Let That be Your Last Battlefield", or "That Which Survives", or maybe some others -- then I would gladly turn off the computer and watch the second New Voyages episode instead. The episode IS a time-travel episode, but a simpler and thus better time-travel episode than most on TNG or Voyager. And it uses that time travel to nicely tie together events from three good episodes. It has a couple of surprise guest stars from the original series. The acting is OK, for the most part. And Ron Boyd as Lt. DeSalle -- the brash young helmsman who may just be more cocky than Kirk -- may be my favorite new Trek character since Rasmussen on TNG. These episodes are huge downloads (roughly 100 MB each), but I encourage diehard fans to check them out. The simplest idea for a Star Trek show: Star Trek The Anthology. Like Twilight Zone, or Outer Limits. A totally new story every week. No fixed permanent characters, no fixed locations, no restrictions except that the stories have to take place in the canonical Star Trek universe. A bit rough on the budget, since there won't be standing sets, but there won't be permanent stars to make contract noises, either. Suddenly, ALL the great ideas others have come up with here fit in. Kirk at the Academy? What's life really like on Ferengi? Whatever happened to all those dozens of omnipotent races Kirk ran across? Explore the early history of the Federation, or any time along the timeline. Bring in some of the old stars for a cameo now and then, if you want. Give famous actors a shot at being in Star Trek for one episode, like they used to be. Give new actors a chance at the franchise. The writers can throw out most of the Script Bible for character. Hell, you can kill them off in anthologies. Bring real SF writers back in again. Give them some leeway. If a theme gets popular, you can write another episode around it. Really popular? Well, you can still do spin-offs. Posted by: tbrosz at February 12, 2005 01:11 AMtbrosz, They missed a chance at Star Trek: Anthology. That's what DS9 could have been. The way to do an anthology on a budget -- i.e., recurring locations and effects and a minimum of recurring characters -- is to have a unifying element: all of the stories involve characters passing through a common location. You may follow those characters as they leave the location, on occasion; but many of the stories take place entirely in its environs. Recurring characters are mostly peripheral. This sort of "crossroads" story goes back at least to Chaucer. DS9 could have gone that way. That was what I expected. Instead, they made the location and the politics surrounding it a central element, and they made the recurring characters the focus. Which I liked just fine. But I think I would have liked Star Trek: Crossroads even better. Posted by: UML Guy at February 12, 2005 08:53 AMWhen Voyager ended, I recommended the franchise take a rest for at least five years. Every series has its fans, but We need time to relax, see what else is out there, and to start MISSING Star Trek again. Then, and only then, will the time be ripe for new blood, new enthusiasm, and new approaches to revitalize the franchise. Posted by: Review Boy at February 12, 2005 01:29 PMSFA:Smallville... nubile teenagers in tight Star Fleet uniforms. I like it. Reminds me of convention sex. Posted by: richard mcenroe at February 13, 2005 11:10 AMThese are all great ideas. I would take a peek at any of these shows and, except for movies, I left Star Trek behind after TNG. I was always curious about the Federation. How it was formed. Why it was headquartered on Earth since ostensively we came late to the space exploration party and humans often were viewed as an inferior species. What was going on on Earth at the time? Were we under one world government or had we found the means to peacefully coexist while maintaining our national identities? (The original cast of characters would suggest so.) Endless possibilities. Yes, I like it. Star Trek could indeed rise again. Posted by: Kyda Sylvester at February 13, 2005 01:34 PMThere is a series of excellent e-books that I would LOVE to see made into a series. Its called "SCE: Starfleet Corps of Engineers" and is about a ship of technological problem solvers who are sent throughout the Federation. Also, I think that the adventures of the Enterprise-B might be a good idea for a few reasons. |
MDS - Give Until It Hurts Terror War Scorecard Watching America 50 Things American Cancer Ablation Center Buy VodkaPundit Stuff
"Best Free Booze on the Internet... and that's saying something!"
Ann Althouse
Across the Atlantic
American Realpolitik
Albion's Seedlings
Justene Adamec
The Argument Clinic
Todd A
Moe Freedman
Allah Is In the House
Body in Mind
Ben Domenech
Duck Season
Banana Counting Monkey
Ted Barlow
Eric Alterman
American Times
|
     |
