"Sure, she's eye candy, but I want REAL candy."

I submitted a line from The Simpsons

"I can't believe I ate the whole thing"

My other idea was "This is how full of it I am"

(At the BBC, the photo's not cropped, and he looks like he's sizing something up...)

"I'll trade my Oscar for a donut this big."

"I am the man from Nantucket!"

I'm now reading Al Franken's book "Rush Limbaugh is a Big Fat Idiot." Too bad he wrote that book before he met Michael Moore. Anyhow, here's my barely clever entry:

"TO HELL WITH OUR FICTIOUS PRESIDENT AND HIS FICTIOUS ELECTION, I'M TAKING THIS FICTIOUS PLATE OF FICTIOUS CHEESEBURGERS AND I'M GOING TO PIG OUT!"

Damned if I can explain it. I'd be working at Subway if somebody didn't think I had talent. Which, come to think of it, wouldn't be all that bad. . . .

"This is just a little lie. You should see my really big lies."

See what would happen to Mike if he gave a Shame On You Saddam! speech.

I crap bigger than our fictitiously elected, fictitious president.

The only way I could get her to come with me was to tell her it was this...well, you know.

"... and those idiots actually believed... wait, what do you mean this is live?"

One more.

"So I said to the escort company, she's got to have a really big..."

Hey, I actually enjoyed "Bowling for Columbine" and MM is very good at docu.however, his shortcoming as a documentarian is his inability to be neutral. I am completely surprised to find thesre are people who.. think the election was illegitimate. I happened to NOT vote for Bush, but the beauty/ugly of our system is the"winner takes all." I would love to switch to a more proportional representation but hey, we got what we got. Or as my Irish grandma said, "Dance with the one who brung ya'?"Right now, I be dancin' with Bush and hoping for a victory waltz. Meanwhile, the likes of MM and Susan Sarandon and the Dixie Chicks are in the process of finding how completely disposable they are to most of America.

Sorry, I misunderstood that it was a headline contest instead of a regular post.
My headline would be:

Ooooh oooh eeeee eee ay ay. Ooh he ay ay. AAAYY YA YA OOOy he ya.

"I just made a huge fool of myself in front of the biggest audience in the world and ruined any credibility I had. I made one of the worst, most ridiculous acceptance speeches in the history of the Academy Awards, and I was even booed by the largest group of wealthy liberals in the world. I disgraced myself. Don't you feel sorry for me even A LITTLE BIT?"

So then I grabbed Rosanne Barr's butt like so.